How To Write Funny

And make more money…probably.

Everybody’s got a funny bone, even Aunt Mildred, who has all the charisma of a dead rat. It’s a universal yearning, this need to giggle and guffaw; it’s in our DNA. So, how do you sprinkle a little joy into a topic that’s drier than Aunt Mildred?

It’s like seasoning a cardboard burger — tricky but not impossible. The key is to keep it as breezy as a Sunday afternoon nap without looking like you’re trying too hard. You want to tickle your reader’s funny bone from the first sentence to the last.

Now, when it comes to humor, my personal Yoda is David Sedaris. The guy could make a dental checkup sound like a circus act. Remember his essay on his Fitbit obsession? If you don’t, you’re missing out on a laugh riot.

Here, then, are a few nuggets of wisdom to sprinkle humor into your writing:

1: Don’t Force the Punchline

I’m all for jokes, but shoehorning one into an article like this would be as out of place as an Iranian at a pool party. The trick isn’t to slap humor on like a sticker; it’s about blending it into the narrative.

Take, for instance, the time a company asked me to pen an article on data-driven decision-making. Snooze-alert, right? But with some digging, I unearthed some real comedy gold — companies that bungled their decisions without data and paid the price.

Remember Google’s attempt to turn us into cyborgs with Google Glass in 2012? They tried to make us shell out to look like tech-savvy nerds, and let’s say it backfired faster than a firecracker in a toad’s rectal cavity.

I didn’t crack a joke; I just let the situation's absurdity do the heavy lifting. The result? The client loved it and now wants more.

2: Be a Master of Subtlety

Good humor should be like a surprise guest at a party — not announced but quietly slipped in. If I had to explain why a blonde changing a lightbulb is funny, well, the joke’s already flatlined. Subtlety is the name of the game; your humor should be like a sly wink in a crowded room.

Once, I penned an essay about getting a fist sandwich from an ex-girlfriend. Now, everyone who witnessed that…